Yeah, it sorts of depend on who that person on my flist is. If it's someone I don't know well and don't care much, I'd probably just defriend because, indeed, they might want to say this on their journal, but I don't want to read it. But when it's someone I have some kind of relationship and I think they would care, and probably they only did it because they didn't think before using that expression (not like that sort of things didn't happen to me before, many times)? Well, I'd want to give them a chance to remove it before I stop reading their journal. There's a good friend who used... I don't remember if it was "gay" or "fagottry" in a problematic way before, and I pointed it to them and they removed it at once.
In this case, I really thought this person would be capable of consider it may hurt me, they're not only a Pagan, they're also LGBT, and judging by their fic, knows a fair deal about the History of the Shoah. Which made me all the most gob-smacked when they reacted as they did.

errr, that was a lot of rambling to basically say "i agree".