Second guessing

[salinea]

I hate passive aggressiveness because it works.

[Poll #1292717]

One being not aggressive at all, and 10 being very aggressive :)

Anything else you want to say on the subject, I'm turning Anonymous comments on.

Comments

[schemingreader.livejournal.com]

I was just thinking, "I've never encountered her being aggressive in discussions," and then I realized that I'm pretty damned aggressive myself sometimes and might not be able to tell the difference.

[etrangere.livejournal.com]

what? You're agressive? No, you're not!! Well, not usually, and even when you are you're very polite and nice!

Or is that my not being able to tell the different as well? O_o;

[busaikko]

Is 1 'hostile' or is 10?.... I don't think you're hostile, at least as far as I know. Then again, I don't think we've ever argued about anything.

[etrangere.livejournal.com]

yes, 10 being extremely aggressive and hostile!

We need something to argue about! Quick, what could I disagree with you about...

[busaikko]

I ticked 6, then, because I consider that 'fiesty and interesting'. One would be your basic flobberworm, which you are not, and 10 would be liek, alert FandomWank now!

I'm American. I've been playing Devil's advocate for fun all my life. It scares the heck out of some Japanese people ('Say, let's argue for fun! Do you want to be pro or anti Obama/teen sex/organised religion/etc.?')

[etrangere.livejournal.com]

I could be a nice flobberworm! :D

Lol, I'm like you, I love arguing things for fun :) I frequently find (female) fandom's more a tadbit too consensual on that plane, although I usually don't like the Cult of Mean either because they're all about the mocking and the not taking anything seriously, and what I love is well argumented debates.

Poor Japanese people XD *imagine them being traumatised by you*

[redcandle17.livejournal.com]

I enjoy arguing too. And if I get into political arguments, I just will not back down or soften my stance, not even if you're my best friend. :P I suspect this tendency is why I'm mostly attracted to conservative men with vastly different beliefs.

[redcandle17.livejournal.com]

I think you're fairly aggressive, but I wanted to comment and say I consider that a good thing. :D

What I hate are people who are pushy, only to start whining about being picked on when they encounter people who won't tolerate their shit.

[etrangere.livejournal.com]

thank you, lol.

Yeah, that's passive aggressive. I don't mind people who are polite and friendly generally speaking if they're not passive aggressive :) or if they don't let me get ridiculed on account of their own dislike of confrontation.

[redcandle17.livejournal.com]

Ah. My defintion of passive-aggressive are those people who never come out and actually say anything, they just make snide little comments and disavow any intent to cause offense.

[etrangere.livejournal.com]

your definition's probably the right one, but I kinda see both behaviour as similar. All about not being obviously agressive, yet pushing the others, and when they snap back, try to look like a rose and you don't understand why they're so angry.

[misstopia.livejournal.com]

I hate this. With a passion.

[etrangere.livejournal.com]

OMG you read my journal.

Yeah, me too. Not quite as much as I hate hypocrisy and self-righteousness but almost.

[misstopia.livejournal.com]

Yeah, Stannis is still your arch-nemesis :P

[etrangere.livejournal.com]

Yeap!

It's rare for me to hate a fictional character, I'm clinging to it :)

[misstopia.livejournal.com]

Heh, I understand, Stannis is capable of a lot of scary intolerant shit :|

BTW I changed my answer to 7.

[deeplyunhip.livejournal.com]

But...Stannis is *my* arch-nemesis. I had no idea he was cheating on me! :(

[etrangere.livejournal.com]

that evil two timer!

[deeplyunhip.livejournal.com]

For real, man - this is just another example of his typical hypocrisy. Perhaps we should both give up on him if he's gonna be like this!

[etrangere.livejournal.com]

b-but who else could I hate? Nobody got me angry and wanting to slap him like Stannis. Nobody could make me happy just by watching them burn like Stannis. What am I gonna do? ;_;

[deeplyunhip.livejournal.com]

Oh, I'm sorry, did I say "both give up on him"? I obviously really meant "both burn him". :)

[misstopia.livejournal.com]

Stannis has HAD it with all his years of loyalty to Selyse, what has it gotten him? He is breaking the chains, my friend, he is becoming a new man. All bets are off.

Also you weren't meeting his needs :(

[deeplyunhip.livejournal.com]

Also you weren't meeting his needs :(

WHAT? How could *I* not meet someone's enemy needs? This is outrageous!

And tragic!
...

Oh, god, just don't tell me he's arch-nemesis-ing Moon Boy as well. :(

*more tragic*

[misstopia.livejournal.com]

Yes, for all we know :\ Sorry you had to find out this way.

[deeplyunhip.livejournal.com]

Oh, Stannis. I really thought he was the Maid. -_-

[misstopia.livejournal.com]

Turns out he's just another ho.

[redcandle17.livejournal.com]

Out of curiosity, how aggressive would you say I am?

[etrangere.livejournal.com]

A good 8 :D

[indigestible.livejournal.com]

I had a hard time with this, because I'd consider your discussion style aggressive, but not hostile, so . . .

[etrangere.livejournal.com]

Perhaps I should have done two scales :)

[hamsterwoman]

As above, I think your style is fairly aggressive, but not at all hostile, so I kind of took an average of the two. :)

[etrangere.livejournal.com]

I see :)

[solesakuma]

I think your style is very aggressive and open... and I believe that's a good thing but I like to argue for fun so I'm probably not the best judge.
I wouldn't consider you hostile but I think many people might. In my eyes, you're aggressive against the ideas, but not to the people, if I make any sense. Since many people conflate the two, you might end up looking hostile to some people.

[etrangere.livejournal.com]

In my eyes, you're aggressive against the ideas, but not to the people
Yeah, that's how I try to be. But I don't want to scare people of, or something either :(

[metzhead.livejournal.com]

eh, garden variety hostile. meaning online you and I would come to loggerheads eventually, but in person, over a couple pints of ale, we'd have spirited and lively discussions.

[etrangere.livejournal.com]

and a couple pints of cider :)

the terms 'garden variety' made me think of a grumpy garden gnomes XD

[metzhead.livejournal.com]

...and that post just 'minded me of the movie Amelie.

now this is hostile:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E929gqIcwwI

[deeplyunhip.livejournal.com]

I gave an 8, though I mainly meant 8 "aggressive" and not necessarily "hostile" though I can see how someone might get that impression. I *personally* don't mind this at all, but I think, in general, this quality can be just as detrimental as it can be beneficial. Two sides to everything and all.

[etrangere.livejournal.com]

Yeah, I don't want to be a flobberworm, but neither do I want to scare people away and make them cry...

[redcandle17.livejournal.com]

I think any adult who cries because of something someone says on the Internet has serious psychological problems. And anyone who claims to be crying to end a discussion they started deserves to be laughed at. But then I'm a mean bitch. :P

[deeplyunhip.livejournal.com]

So instead of a flobberworm, the balance you're going for is like..a hippogriff? And the "scary" people are blast-ended screwts or whatever those thing were called?

[trobadora]

What number is for "normal"? *g*

[etrangere.livejournal.com]

average 5?

[trobadora]

All right, then!